1000 Years of Annoying the French - Charley R In Paris

Here it is, the moment you've all been waiting for! Those of you who know me - and possibly many of you who simply pick up on my general nature from what you do know of me - will probably have suspicions of what happens when a sixteen-year-old history nerd with a particular fetish for old buildings, outrageous behavior and silly outfits is unleashed into a trip on sixteenth-century France, the very home of all the atrocities listed above.

So, to mediate this, I have tried to file down to the very best of my pictures to illustrate what happened when my History class and I went to pester our beloved pals over the Channel.

Anyway, enough of my blather - on with the show! Click on the piccies to make them bigger - the ones at Versailles are way better up close especially :)

Day One: Travel, Arrival and Walking Tour of Paris:

The top of the Bastille monument - the actual Bastille itself was destroyed several centuries before, and this is all that's left.

Awesome Paris architecture!

Local church just stuck casually in the middle of a high street ... as you do.

Talk about a weird spot for some real estate!

Front of the Hotel Sully - "hotel" meaning "stately home" in the period. Too big to fit in me camera lens!

Henry IV (I think?) looking impressive atop his horse.

Louis XIV - closeup of a very rusty statue! Apparently it suffered a bit while being hidden from the crowds during the French Revolution, hence the rusty look.

Looks like the architect got a wee bit tipsy when he stuck that on a house there...

It's a library! I don't care if it's French, it's a library!

Amusing street art :P

The oldest house in Paris - the reason the base is smaller than the first floor was to avoid the land tax. That, or the builder had a seriously wonky protractor!

Front of some fancy old administrative building.

Side-view of the Hotel Du Ville - town hall to you and me.

Town hall again - eat your heart out, 10 Downing Street!

Ile du Cite, from the Pont Neuf.

Helmet a bit too big for you, luv?

Joan of Arc shrine inside Notre Dame

Henry II (I think...) and lackey.

Notre Dame cathedral - I had to stand on the other side of a street atop the base of a lampost to get this shot!

An evening shot from a particularly handy lampost.

Day Two: Versailles and the Louvre:

Louis XVI and his famous "down peasants!" hand motion.

Outer gates of Versailles palace.

Casual giant chapel...

Wow, this guy looks tall! ... Guess his name? Pepin the Short!

"Hmm, lovely. Can your little man make one in pink?"

Ceiling ... ceiling ... *faints*

Louis' private chapel.

Outside the gates again!

"Is that ... a zit!?"

Closeup of sculpture alongside a door.

Upside-down shot of another amazing ceiling!

The famous hall of mirrors.

Queen's bed ... looks so comfy ...

Napoleon! 

To any fans of my Aeserion  Trilogy ... does he look familiar? ;)

My best buddy and I outside the palace! (I'm on the left)

Making new friends!

I told you the French couldn't read maps...

Inappropriate fountain sculpture is inappropriate.

LE EXTERMINATE!

Fish are friends, not food!

"Nuuuu! Not the sponge! Anything but the sponge!"

"What are you looking at?"

Nosy parker much?

Taa daa! 'Tis me again!

Outside the Louvre!

Louis XVI again...

Any Alexandre Dumas fans out there ... you know this guy.

I feel short!

Shot of the ceiling from inside the Louvre pyramid!

Unfortunately, I wasn't allowed to take any piccies inside the gallery itself - apparently it damages the artwork. Sorry guys!

Day Three: Champs Elysees Street and Homeward Bound:

In which the flash button plays games with my friend's metallic Eiffel Tower sculpture.

The Eiffel Tower!

Sky shot - we were on a night cruise of the Seine, and I managed to snap this one just before we left the dock.

Eiffel Tower from an alternative angle.

Arc Du Triomph!

Carving on the Arc.

And there you have it, dear readers! Of course, there was plenty about the trip that I could tell you that can't appear in these pictures - the copious amounts of crepés eaten, my many near-death experiences on the Parisian Underground Metro (the thing wanted to eat me, I swear it!), getting lost in the Louvre ... and Francois. He's a little stone gargoyle that I bought for a souvenir, a near replica of one of the famous gargoyles that lives atop Notre Dame.

Also, to anyone who's wondering where the title of this post came from, you might want to check out this book. I read it last year, and it is perhaps one of the funniest, saddest and most entertaining history books ever. And the best part? It's all absolutely true!

- Charley R