Thursday 19 April 2012

Not Gonna Write You A Love Scene

Love is but a form of madness.
The Bard has spoken.

Whether or not a story has a large emphasis on the role of love, odds are there's going to be a little bit of it. Humans are naturally inclined to form attatchments to one another - in fact, as are most Higher Mammals, several birds, and a large proportion of the animal kingdom (though the entailments of "attachment" range from mating for life to a one-night stand that ends in the male having his head eaten). Love isn't something that's easily ignored and - unless your character is some sort of android or psycopath (not that there's anything wrong with that!) - odds are they'll form some sort of loving attachment at some stage in their lives.

One problem - romance. I can't do it.

I'm sure I'm not alone here - many young authors like me simply don't have the life experience to write a convincingly realistic sort of love that doesn't morph into Super Friendzone or an awkward, clunky, sickeningly cliche series of embraces and snogging sesssions. That, and I personally have little passion for romance - it's alright, as long as it gets out of the way for good action scenes, character development, an engaging plot, a few tears and a giggle every now and again.

And from this logic, I cunningly went and got one of my own plots tangled up in a love triangle.

Captain, I hear you cry, that was most illogical. 

You're telling me. This one isn't the only occurence of this sort of complication either - a good chunk of plot in my 2009 NaNoWriMo hinged on a relationship breakdown, and many stories I write collaboratively have a romance element to them.

Never mind shooting myself in the foot. I just sent the co-ordinates of my exact location to a sword-happy nazgul.

They say you should "write what you know". Normally I'd say "Bah!" to that and continue to write out-of-this-world adventures that I could just as easily perform in real life as I could walk on the surface of the moon or speak fluent Klingon, but with romance ... I'd almost advocate it.

Romance is tricky because, odds are, if you don't know what you're doing and hope you can pull it off convincingly anyway, someone who does know what they're doing will pick up on it. That, or your inexperience will completley mangle your plot. I've seen a few moments in a relationship turn even the most likeable characters into 1) pathetically obsessed individuals who spend their whole time snogging or bewailing the absence of their other half, 2) deluded idiots who do incredibly stupid things for people they've only known for ... two chapters, and counting, or 3) ridiculously weak characters who, despite being perfectly competent before, now cannot function while knowing their significant other is in danger / missing / angry with them for behaving in this daft manner.

On the other hand, if you do learn to do it correctly, it's also spectacular for heightening the personal stakes for a character, showing another dynamic to individuals, providing motives for various actions (both in the lovers, their friends, or the jealous third wheel), as well as the usual "awww!" or "nooo! You were so cute together!" moments for the readers.

Unfortunately, other than clambering into the TARDIS and whizzing back to a 60s hippie commune, there aren't many ways to brush up on your skills with romance. There's the usual way of going through life until you experience it but, as one can never be sure when / if / how this will occur, it's a bit of a gamble.

Or, we can do what authors do best. Read each other, and learn from the experts. For young or inexperiencd authors, reading love scenes from other books and learning about what makes a good / bad / downright weird love scene or sequence is probably the best approach. You don't have to read romantic books per se, just put your Author Hat on - you know, the orange one with the ear flaps - and look critically at the technique as you read. That is, if you're not already crying or laughing too hard to do so, in which case its effect is probably rather clear already.

In the meantime, fare thee well dear readers. And let there be love!

- Charley R

25 comments:

  1. I have the same problem you do, my friend. I'm an inexperienced, clueless idiot, I am. So I follow good authors around and when they make someone smooch, I'm standing off to the side taking notes. By now I've compiled a list, large enough that I feel I could try a romantic scene without too much damage. Unfortunately, all my characters are single, and like it.

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    1. Hehe, some of mine are single but don't - hence hte trouble. Blah, need to go read more love scenes xP

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    2. I've actually learned more about writing romance from everywhere but love scenes than from them. Love scenes are all the same, but it's the setup that you need. You can't just have a character running around getting kissed once at each major world landmark, without having some sort of setup. You've got to show that the feelings are there when the character isn't short on breath due to an intentional blockage of the mouth even more than when the mouth is obstructed.

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    3. Exactly! It's just a pity I don't read a lot of books where the hero(ine) is massively romantically inclined, lol!

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    4. Neither do I. I'm telling you, I get more information from books written without love scenes altogether than with them. Compare and contrast, my friend. It's a tedious business, but when you put it together it makes perfect sense.

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    5. Yes master *bows* I will obey ;)

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    6. Good. You have grown wise, my pupil. *bows back too far and topples over*

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    7. *hides giggles in well-practice fashion*

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    8. *glares and straightens up, then teeters too far backward, falling on his rear with a grunt of indignation quietly reminiscent of a kraken's flatulence*

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    9. *the giggle-hiding fails. falls over backwards laughing hysterically*

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  2. Love is a powerful force. You'll note Sarah and Jason have a past history that I feel allows the love to be real... You know how we're plotting to make the whole Ash and Morgan romance a bit more realistic... sappy as it is.

    Of coruse you probably also know I'm obsessed with True Love. It does play a bit of a role in my Pheonix Trilogy.

    You also know that I've told you that you haven't done half bad with the romance I have seen you post. You have the idea of it, even if you haven't experienced it...

    Not that I can say I'm that experienced I've married my thrid boyfriend. I'd like to think I'd good at lasting relationships though, seeing as we've been together for over 16 years (married for almost 9 of them), and we're still going quite strong.

    Guess that means I suck at the breakup scenes, huh? :}

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    1. Hehe, it's not so bad with FB - I was stupidly young when we started, which accounts for some of the rubbish. We'll straighten it out soon. Besides, it's a collab, and all the rest of you three have done relationships and all that, so it balances out my cluelessness quite nicely xD

      Taking swings in the dark and hitting the target isn't a terribly trustworthy method ...

      Breakup scenes are easy for me - I watch my friends squabbling with their boyfriends sometimes. Sometimes they make up, sometimes they don't .... or it could just be my affinity for discord that means i'm no good with love, because it goes against my natural instinct for evil xD

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  3. And this is why Draft 6.5 of Watching is infinitely better than, say, draft one. Though I daresay I've still got a way to go.

    Also, nothing wrong with being a psychopath... IF you can spell it. I would think after all this time hanging out with me you would have learned, my dear Spookybeast? There's an H in there somewhere... :D

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    1. Disappearing H syndrome! I swear I had one in there once .... it must have escaped. Thanks for the spot! :)

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    2. I borrowed it. To feed it to Cormac.

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  4. My sister loves to read books with lots of romance, but for me, the best kind of reads have a solid plot with romance as a subplot. Especially fantasies where there's this huge epic storyline going on, and then there's some romance in addition. Or a book where the romance is there, but it's simple - nothing too excessive.

    What I can't figure out is why, with that being the case, the entire plot of The Sandcastle's Way would crumble without a certain romance. Sheesh. I don't like to read books that are centered around the romance, but I don't seem to have a problem writing a romantic book. Typical. xD

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    1. I completely concur! Every time we get to gratuitous romance in a book I'm just like: "Meh, less kissy, more sword clanging please."

      Some books do make good use of romance and relationships, though, and they can be essential to the plot ... just as long as they're not the WHOLE plot, you should be fine xD

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    2. Most of my favorite books have a major big plot with romance on the side. Harry Potter, for instance - no huge romance going on there, but it is on the side of a huge seven-book battle between good and evil! The Lord of the Rings - there are only hints of romance in the background with Aragorn/Arwen and Sam/Rosie. Ooh - and not long ago I read The Scorpio Races by Maggie Stiefvater, which was a sort of a mythological fantasy. The romance is definitely there, but just barely - there are no makeout scenes or anything like that. Just a few kisses and a lot of leading up to it. The thing is, I thought it was an incredibly fulfilling romance, in ADDITION to the already awesome plot containing flesh-eating horses from the sea! So yeah, I don't think a huge romance is necessary to a good book. A little on the side goes a long way. :)

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    3. Could not agree more with you :)

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    4. Scorpio Races! I like that book :) But I still prefer 'Ballad', though that could be because I've read it fourteen times to reading Scorpio Races once so far.

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  5. Ah, see this subject is where my multiple personality disorder kicks in ;P
    While I have no problem with READING about romance, I can't stand it in real life, or watching it in movies/tv shows/etc.

    Apparently my philosophy is that reading about love-dovey things is fine, but seeing it is out of the question XD

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    1. Haha, you nutter. I can see where you're coming from - WATCHING people eat each other's faces off is a very different thing to reading about it, after all ;)

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    2. Yeah... face-eating is not fun to watch, Haha.

      There are a few times when I've gone all "Awwww! They're so cute!" But it depends on the characters. Mostly, though, I'm just off to the side gagging. Or eye-rolling. Whichever fits the situation best XD

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    3. I concur. Wholeheartedly.

      You speak mah language :P

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