- Sitting on a mattress.
- In an empty room.
- Surrounded by packets of antiseptic wipes.
- Opposite an open suitcase containing all that is left of my worldly possessions.
And then I realised how many strange things I did today:
- Scrubbed walls with the aforementioned antiseptic wipes.
- Pulled false coals out of an electric fireplace. Counted coals. Washed them. Put them outside to dry on newspaper.
- Chased invading moths out of the bathroom with a hoover, shouting quotes from Shakespeare's Henry V.
- Climbed into green wheelie bin with bottle of sink cleaner and rubber gloves. Scrubbed vigorously. Dubbed myself "bin-scrubber to the gods".
And last week:
- Stood on tables, attacking spider-web-fortresses with a fuzzy mophead.
- Spent two hours inside a kitchen unit, looking for lost kitchen utensils.
- Cooked pizza. On a barbecue.
- Packed cardboard boxes. Taped them shut. Cut tape open, put more things in, re-taped box. Rinse and repeat.
- Dismantled bed. Forgot that had dismantled bed. Fell over mattress while looking for bed. Hit face on wall. Cursed colourfully.
. . . What has happened to my life?
~ Charley R