Recently, exciting events in my life have been rather like buses: you'll wait and age for one to come along, and then a thousand of them will suddenly lurch around the corner and reduce you to jam in the middle of the road.
While the SWAT team reclaim what is left of my innards from the tarmac, I shall tell you all about it.
As you may or may not have guessed by my sudden disappearance and cryptic references to existential crises the year round, I have finally left school - definitively, once and for all, never to return - and proved this by attending the school Leavers' Ball on Saturday night.
A word to the wise: riding fairground rides in a floor-length ball gown is not for the faint hearted.
Needless to say, though, it was a pretty emotional night - tears all over the place (none of them mine, oddly enough), many hugs and promises to stay in contact, a lot of off-kilter dancing to songs we only knew half the words to and, of course, only five hours' sleep between the end of the festivities and the homeward journey in the morning.
This picture was, of course, taken before I got into the gown, and long before my first ride on the Dodgems reduced this rather glorious affair to the fluffy blonde ruination that accurately mirrored my mental state for the rest of the evening.
Until that day, the longest I had ever spent in a haidresser's chair was approximately an hour. The magnificence you see before you here took just under three hours - colouring, washing, cutting, and styling included.
At this moment, I am still rather confused as to exactly what I think of it - not in the least because I still jump every time I fail to recognise myself in the mirror every morning.
Then again, it did make me feel like Cersei Lannister. That's always a plus.
In other news, I've also been adventuring in - wait for it - driving. I passed the theory component of my test nearly two weeks ago now, and on Friday I will be taking the pratical part. Of course, to help me on my way, I've been enrolled in a 40-hour intensive driving course: four hours every day, every day. Admittedly I had a few days off in the middle, but as those days coincided with the Ball, you can understand that neither my brain nor my deeply abused kneecaps were in much of a state to be dealing with much in the afternoons.
Then again, that's not entirely true. Which brings me on to my last piece of excitement . . .
Many of you, doubtless, have heard of The Book Chewers blog - devourers of books the world over, compilers of quotes and memories and theories (among other things), and most certainly one of the coolest conglomerations of people on the web.
You may remember that I wrote a post for them, some time ago - When Characters Come Alive - during that month's discussion of Cornelia Funke's Inkheart.
Well, if you liked that, then there's good news for you - the team have, out of their infinite beneficience, invited me to become a full-time member of the staff!
My first post is due to appear on the 10th of July, and after that I'll be posting every other Wednesday, give or take a few extemporaneous circumstances.
Phew! That was rather a longer list of things than I had anticipated. Doubtless I could fit more on it, but I'm not entirely sure that my attempts to articulate the madness that is masquerading as my life would be as successful as I would like.
So, dear readers, I shall bid you all a fond adieu - or rather, a fond 'hello', because in the near future it looks as if I will be back and posting much more in line with my somewhat neglected schedule. I've got some very exciting post ideas in the pipeline, along with many more exicing announcements when the time comes.
Hold onto your hats. It's going to be a bumpy ride . . .
~ Charley R