AMY POND IS DEAD!
... No no no, that's not a spoiler for the Doctor Who Christmas Special (I'm not that cruel and heartless, honest). I'm talking about my poor faithful laptop. I've had her for five years, and in that time she has borne the weight of numerous essays, powerpoints, music downloads, poems, novels and a thousand other things in between. True, we haven't always got along - she's slow, she hates Java, she sometimes skews the display on webpages and buffers videos slower than a one-legged torgoise - and she crashes so often that the IT department and I are on first name terms.
But she's always been fixed, and I've carried her back to resume her life as my overworked, over-abused and indispensible sidekick.
But now, at last, she's gone and died for the last and final time. I am writing this on the frustratingly tiny keyboard of a loaned laptop from the IT department, while they see if they can give Amy one last reboot that will last her until the end of term.
This may sound pathetic, but I actually think I miss her. It's not just that I gripe about the irritating features of the loaner - it won't keep me logged into my accounts, I don't like the browser and the keyboard makes me feel like a ham-handed Viking with frostbite - I just miss her. And I don't know why.
Well, I did buy an £80 charger to replace the one that broke the day I brought her home for half term. She went and died on me the next day. Murphy's Law strikes again...
And yes, dear readers, it is for this reason that I have been absent from your lives for all this time. The family Mac is under a lot of use, and with no access to any other computer, I couldn't get on and let you all know why I was gone. For all you know, I could have been eaten by giant purple fish fingers from Jupiter and you wouldn't be any the wiser.
Sorry about that. You will all doubtlesss be pleased to know that NaNoWriMo is being your little karma angel and giving me hell for leaving you. I can feel the Word Document glaring at me from my toolbar as I type this...
Anyway, I'd better get back to work. I'll let you all know how I'm doing later - with lots of fun quizzes, challenges and excerpts to pave the way.
Right ... c'mere Vidal, you have places to go, and people to maim!